I'm Baaaack

Well, that was a while, wasn't it? I haven't posted anything since early December. No reason for it, the muse simply failed to strike. Okay, the muse is back, inspired by the Dem's loss in the Massachusetts special election.

Before I get to my comments, first, let's set the stage. Ol' Swimmer Ted, finally receiving a little of the karmic redress he's so dearly deserved, for so many years, contracts brain cancer. I read somewhere, and I hope it's true, that the type he had was particularly painful. It cannot undo anything the murderous, treasonous swine did in his long and infamous senate career, but it puts a little into the payback column. I just wish I could believe, as Emperor Misha does, that there is a Hell, a place of fire and brimstone, where the Drunken Lifeguard will spend eternity roasting on a spit...where the spit is "Satan's barbed cock," and the lecherous loser is rotating on it about his rectal passage. Unfortunately, I can take no solace in that. Ahh, well, as I say, at least he died in pain.

In addition, he died leaving one of his great Life's Projects incomplete. There they were, poised to pass the health care waiting list act, and Buick's worst spokesman up and dies. Now they have to fill his seat. Fortunately, Massachusetts law requires that (a) an empty federal senate seat be filled by Gubernatorial appointment, and (b) Mass has a Democrat governor.

Oh, wait, no, (a) is no longer the case. In 2004, when it looked like Johnny Treason was going to unseat Bumbletongue Bush for the presidency, the Mass legislature changed the rules. See, they had a RINO governor at the time, and a thin senate majority. If Romney had the power to appoint the new senator, he might appoint a Republican, thinning (or erasing, I forget) the Dem majority. Guess who urged the legislature to make the change. That's right, Treason Ted himself.

Fast forward; Chappaquiddick Ted is dying, and the Dems have a 60 seat supermajority. So old "I never drink my scotch straight up, I always mix it...with vodka" suggests the state house change the rule back. The optics of this are terrible, and hell, it's Mass, which hasn't elected a Repub to national office since the Medieval Warming Period, so, no change, and they have a special election.

The candidate for the Dems, Martha Coakley, is a disaster. And should probably be in prison for prosecutorial misconduct. But, she has a "D" after her name, and she does have statewide recognition, having been elected to statewide office. The Repub's candidate, Scott Brown hasn't these advantages. He does however, come with his own advantages, namely, Martha Coakley and pResident Uh-bama.

Long story short, for the first time since dinosaurs walked the earth, Massachusetts elected a Repub. Result, the Dem supermajority is gone, and Kennedy's pet project is in serious shit, in fact, probably toast.

My reaction...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Whew, let me catch my breath here...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Oh, lord, the irony is so creamy and rich I, in Ace's formulation, want to whip out my balls and dip them in it.

A few years back, during a spat between the Dicksuck Chicks and Toby Keith, there appeared a tee shirt for Dipsy Slut fans, the not too subtle FUTK.

I'm thinking we resurrect those letters. And rejoice that, hopefully, evil two tiered American health care continues to exist, so that cutting edge medicine continues to advance, and there is a pressure outlet for all the crappy socialized medical systems. And, what the hell, it will make Canadians happy, since they'll still have the existence of our piss poor socialized medical system to help them fell superior to Americans.

FUTK

McHitler, You Really Are an Asshole

Have I already used that title for a post? I don't think so, I haven't called the seedy little shit we have for a premier Hitler yet. I think. Oh, well, I'm not a real believer in Godwin's law anyway, so fuck it. You don't like me likening him to a fascist, maybe he shouldn't act like one. Fuck off out of the country and have his henchmen ram one of the greatest tax hikes in provincial history through by procedural manouvre? And then have the sheer unmitigated fucking gall to tell us how good it's going to be for us? Fuck off Dalton. May I call you Dalton? I know in polite company you don't call a man by his first name unless he asks you to, but, well, I'm not feeling very polite, so fuck it, and fuck you, Dalton.

Anyway, the corrupt little fuck is off pissing our tax dollars away on a junket to India. I guess protocol required he take his fingers out of his ears and stop screaming, "La la la la, I can't hear you objecting to the HST, la la la la" At least long enough to say, "Fuck off taxpayers, I'll do what I want, I'm a Liberal with a majority government." I quote from memory.

Seriously, though, the incompetent, functional retard said basically that, although he phrased it more along the lines of, "We're going to bring in the HST because a modern Ontario needs a modern tax system, and this will help make us competitive going forward." Umm, dickhead, how, exactly? And feel free to use one syllable words, since, well, that's all your stunted intellect can handle, anyway.

If we're lucky, we're just easing out of a really bad recession. Raising taxes is one REALLY good way to take a fragile recovery and guarantee that it's merely the upswing of a double dip recession. Jeebus, this jackass has the "How to turn a cyclic recession into a major depression" handbook, and he's running it step by step.

Idiotic spending and borrowing levels. Check.
Major new spending initiatives. Check.
Disappear money down the corruptocrat rat hole. Check.
Raise taxes. Check.

Great, zippy, just fucking great. Mrs. Fulminandrew and I are doing okay. Not great, but okay; we're making it through, but this extra thousand bucks you're going to hoover out of our pockets is going to hurt. I can't imagine what it's going to do to the poor bastards on EI, fixed income, pensions, or scraping by paycheck to paycheck.

They say you get the government you deserve. That's bullshit. The stupid fuckers who voted Liberal and NDP get the government they deserve. What the fuck did I, and all the other actually productive residents of Ontario, do to deserve the Dalton McGuinty BOHICA treatment? They got the govt they deserve, but they're taking my anus along for the ride, and I really, really don't fucking appreciate it.

Assholes.

What to Write About? Don't Worry, There Will be Beautiful Asian Women in Bikinis, and Heavy Metal

Well, the fulminatin' one has been on hiatus for a bit. No particular reason for it, and certainly no lack of material or inspiration. I've just been too bloody lazy to log on and post something. So, let's take a shotgun approach to the last couple of weeks.

Family...You might think that having 5 couples, with 8 children under six, in our small abode for 5 hours would be rough on a man whose sufferance of fools is perhaps a touch lacking. Yes, you might think that, but last week, under those conditions, I had a blast. Damn, but I love kids. Whether they're little wiggly blobs whose eyes barely focus, or six year olds kicking my ass at Wii golf, if they've got good parents (and all the kids in question do) they are a joy.

Okay, I've got the sappy shit out of the way now.

So, in order to prepare for the above mentioned gathering, Mrs. Fulminandrew and I had to clean up the pigsty in which we live. It's amazing how quickly one 2 year old can turn an otherwise tidy abode into a disaster area, but The Boy manages. And to keep his curious little paws off of things, stuff just gets shoved into places he can't access, like my study. 8 bleeding hours or more to clean it out enough for company. And that's aside from the rest of the joint. Part of the reason for the hiatus was simply tidying up.

The Mrs. asked me, "Should we entertain more, or not at all?" Now, being the antisocial bastard you may have figgered me to be, and considering the work necessary to get the place ready for company, you might expect my answer was "Not at all." Quite the contrary. I'm not really antisocial, I'm anti-idiot. My wife has excellent taste in friends (her taste in sisters, and husbands, might be a bit suspect), not a jackass among them, so I had a grand time. So, entertain more, to force us to (a) keep the place tidier and (b) throw out shit that dearly needs throwing out.

Okay, enough with the personal...Hockey.

Well, Leafs nation, the suckage quotient of the boys in blue and white is slightly less these days. Yes, they got creamed by Boston last night, but Boston is a real team, not an AHL team with delusions. And, yes, they got embarassed by Buffalo, but I believe it's in the Maple Leafs charter that they have to suck against the Sabres. Dunno why, but there you go. Outside of that, they've managed to get within 7 (seven!!!) points of a playoff spot. They even "won" a shootout (and isn't that a dumb fucking way to end a team game?) for a change. They'll still be in tough to make the playoffs, but I posted on that earlier. Anyway, they've been generally more entertaining (and in a positive way).

Now on to the meaty stuff...Boy are Canadians a pack of dumb fucks.

So, Dalton McFerretFace is out to jack up our taxes to the tune of better than $1000 per family, per year. He's gonna do this while sticking his greasy, corrupt fingers in his ears shouting "Lalalalala I can't hear anybody objecting to the HST." He's gonna do this while offering a one time bribe of $1000 dollars of our own money to swallow it. And he's gonna do this all the while telling us how increasing taxes is going to help us economically. I know the guy's a complete fucktard, but, does everyone else have to be?

Let us think about this. First, everything that has GST will now have PST. That's where the extra $1000 per comes in. That's money out of your pocket and into the coffers at Queen's park. You know, the place that just magically made 25 BILLION dollars disappear. While finding 2.5 billion dollars to gift to the teacher's unions (more on that later). Now, money out of your pocket to be invested pissed away by the govt equals slower economic growth. Why? Because govt is incompetent, and Liberal government is fucking incompetent.

Oh, and Mr. Harper, I know you've been on about harmonizing the sales taxes since before you were elected. And I know, in theory, it's actually a good idea. But the timing here sucks, and the GST is too broadly based. If we add 8% to everything not covered by the GST, the Ontario economy is going straight down the shitter. And, I know you're from west (at least of late) but Ontario is still the 800 pound gorilla in the Canadian economy. Narrow the base of the GST (bad), or tell that shit for brains in Queen's Park to lower the provincial chunk to 6 - 7% (g00d).

Now, let us throw into the mix the national campaign to stop the new TV tax of "up to $10 a month." Ooh, yeah, let's fight a $100 tax, while meekly bending over to take a $1000 tax, good and hard. Especially a $100 tax that you don't have to pay. I won't be paying it. Guess why not. That's right, I don't have fucking cable. You think I want to drop 40, 50 bucks a month or more on the brain rotting shite on TV? Anyone who doesn't want to pay the tax, cancel your cable, or satellite. Presto, no tax. Now, how are you going to do this with McShithead's HST? (crickets chirp)

Wake the fuck up, people, TV is not a necessity. Heating oil and electricity are.

Health care.

So, the cocksmoker that McFuck-off-and-die-Cambridge-residents sent to fuck up their hospital even more has determined that the way to balance the %28 under funded budget is to...cut services. Good thing we have Liberals in charge of our health care, 'cause, you know, those damned conservatives cut health care to the bone and the Liberals, well, they would never make health care cuts, right? (there go those fucking crickets again)

Oh, and on the topic of the Harris Tories' health care cuts. The following graph is from the Ontario 2000 budget.


Do you see a cut to health care spending there? Anyone? The next time some Liberal cocksmoker whinges on about the Tories cutting health care, well, now you know the truth. For more on that graph, go here.

Have I fulminated enough? For now, perhaps.

On the plus side, I shall leave you with Arisa Oda...





And a classic from the Oz man.

Ignatieff, What a Putz

Now, I don't, generally, disagree too vehemently with Jay Currie. Hell, I wouldn't have put him in my blogroll if I thought he were an idiot, but I gotta take issue here.

Once upon a time Currie was, rightly, castigating the Harper "Conservatives" for their Liberal ways and opined that, since the "conservatives" were behaving like Liberals, if he had to take stuffy, pompous Harper, or his Liberal counterparts, he'd take the Ignatieff Liberals. At least, he reasoned, Ignatieff had style.

Yes, Mr. Currie, it turns out that Ignatieff does have style. I mean, gawky, pompous, whiny, deer-in-the-headlights, political naif is a style. I'm just thinking that it's really not what you meant when you suggested that he has style.

What prompted this little rant? This week's second reading of the bill to repeal the gun registry. Saw Mr. Ignatieff on the news whining about the evil conservatives politicizing the gun registry.

Guess what, moron, it was your incompetent, corrupt Cretinite predecessors who wrote the law in the first place. That would be the act that brought it into the political sphere, dare I say, politicizing it.

Get this through your thick, tourist head Mr. Ignatieff, between 1 and 2 BILLION dollars have been wasted getting farmers to register their gopher guns. Also, see if you can drive this through your thick skull, criminals break the law, it's the unique property that makes them criminals (use a pound sledge hammer if you think it will help). I'm thinking that maybe, just maybe, the street gangs and biker gangs who account for most of the gun crime (pre - you didn't register your squirrel rifle, off to jail with you farmer brown) aren't going to register their guns.

Oh, and, btw, the guns most frequently used in crime, handguns, already required registration. So, please, either (a) get a clue or (b) get off your whiny, pompous, faux outrage high horse. This country has serious problems, and we need a serious oppostition leader. And if you can't handle the job, Power Corps will give it to Bob Rae, and we REALLY don't need a Canada level rerun of the disaster that was his premiership.

McGuinty, the Gift That Keeps on Giving

Jeebus, I've known for years that this guy was (1) stupid, (2) slimy, (3) stupid, (4) corrupt, (5) stupid (6) an asshole and, most of all (7) stupid. Just look at the blank stare, and listen to the stuttering, stumbling, monotonous delivery of boilerplate talking points from any speech he gave back when the adults were in charge of the province.

Anyway, what I never thought he'd be is the non-idiotarian blogger's gift that keeps on giving. Of course, I never expected to be a blogger. Hell, blogging didn't even exist back when I had this unflushed turd's number. But, to give the devil his due, the dumb fuck simply can't open his slack jawed pie hole without giving me the inspiration for a post.

The latest McStinkyism to inspire me to put fingers to keyboard? Mr. McShitforbrains considers it to be absolutely imperative that we all get the Mexican flu vaccination. Even though it's not properly tested. Even though it's been rushed to market. Even though the doctors' stories change on a daily basis. Yup, it's essential that we get the fucking shot.

Well, now that McBonehead has weighed in, the decision is made. No shot for the fulminatin' one. If he wants me to get it that much, it's gotta be a bad thing. That particular blind squirrel has already found his nut for the decade.

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not one of those "vaccinations are the debbil" fruitcakes. Mrs. Fulminandrew has friends who express profound regret that they got their first child all the standard childhood vaccinations. Yes, it's a crying shame that the little nipper won't die of whooping cough, or be crippled by polio, or go sterile from late contracted mumps. Mrs. F was wondering if we should get the boy his vaccinations. As she stays home with the little devil, she makes most of the decisions regarding his upbringing. BUT. But the fulminatin' one put his size 11 down there, and the little booger got his shots.

Having established my not-a-distilled-water-in-place-of-actual-medicine takin' pinhead, I gotta say, I had serious reservations about the Mexican flu shot. As noted above, too rushed, untested, changing stories, not to mention single source. So, I must now do something I thought I'd never, ever do. I must give sincere thanks to Dalton "dumber than dishwater" McGuinty for sealing the deal. Now I know the Mexican flu shot is worse than useless, and won't bother to get it.

Thanks, Dalton. You moron.

Heavy Metal Monday, McGuinty is a Pinhead Edition

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know, calling this the "McGuinty is a Pinhead Edition" of Heavy Metal Monday really doesn't narrow down the possible topics a whole helluva lot, does it?

Let's narrow it down. The two greatest spending priorities of the provincial governments are (1) health care and (2) education. In Ontario they eat up about 3/4 of the provincial budget (1/2 for health and 1/4 for education), and the functional retard we have "running" the show in Queen's Park is fucking up both of them at this very minute.

How? I'd say. "Let me count the ways," but I have two specific examples in mind. Universal, all day babysitting for 4 and 5 year olds. Oops, I mean kindergarten. And the hatchet job the fucker is doing on the folks in Cambridge.

I gave props to Premier Ferret Face for figuring out that all boys education is an idea whose time has come. Now it's back to the brickbat.

Universal, all day kindergarten for 4 and 5 year olds, Dalton? To the (official) tune of 1.5 billion dollars per year. When, you cock smoking prick, your govt is running a 25 billion dollar deficit?

Some questions, you weasel faced street pizza: Do you really think I'm stupid enough to believe any govt's spending projections, much less a socialist piece of crap govt? Or do you just figure you need the anencephalic vote?

Do you really believe there is any educational and economic benefit to it? Or are you disturbed that you didn't get re-elected with 99% of the vote, so you need to start the statist indoctrination at 4. Hell, numbnuts, some dipshit in Washington DC wants to start kindergarten at 3. Get 'em before they're out of diapers, maybe then you can program all independant thought out of their heads.

Why are you such a lying crapweasel? This has nothing, specifically, to do with the topic to hand, I just want to know.

Considering you're about to pile probably 3 billion a year onto a budget already 25 billion in the red, just where is the money going to come from? You think that HST tax hike is going to increase revenue? Really? No increased underground economy, no driving business under or out of province? You're really gonna get all that lovely money, are you? Shithead.

I know, you can get the money by cutting health care. You can start by screwing over those impertinent bastards in Cambridge, who absolutely refuse to be good little germans and elect a Liberal.

For my reader, if you don't get the reference, I heard on the news today that the toad the province has parachuted in to shut down the Cambridge hospital...oops, I mean, balance the hospital budget, is planning on cutting 5 million from the budget. Brilliant plan. The fucking hospital is 28% underfunded. Let's see if we can't get that underfunding above the magical 1/3. Maybe then there'll be an outbreak of e difficile, or flesh eating bacteria, or the bubonic plague, and a bunch of people will die, and you can finally close the place down. That'll teach the stupid, PC voting peasants not to pay proper homage to His Royal Scungiliciousness, Dalton fucking McGuinty.

Sayyyyy, actual, real cuts to health care. The ones I showed in my last post to never have occurred in the Mike Harris years. Brought to you by the party of "protecting health care and Canadian Values," the lying, scum sucking, Liberal Piece of Shit party.

I truly hope you die a lingering and painful death, you vomitous cretin.

What in the hell am I going to choose for a song to go with this? These two latest ilLiberal moves are nuts, but I did Crazy Train last week.

Lets go back to good ol' rock and roll, heavy metal ancestors AC DC to describe where McShithead is taking us.



And for real heavy metal...gonna go to Opeth, and Ghost of Perdition, also in honour of where the spineless crapweasel is taking us. God DAMN, I hate that prick.

Liberals Really Are Lying Sacks of S**t

It was a close call for the fulminatin' one today. I was on my way home from meeting with a customer and, as I am wont to do, I turned on my local talk station. The local talker had on one of Premier McDickhead's ministers (Colleges and Technology or some such), and the "honourable minister fired off one of the standard Liberal tropes; that the Harris Tories "slashed" health care spending. The red curtain of blood descended, and I had to concentrate hard not to run into a ditch at 120 km/h.

At any rate, in reply I say, "Fuck off, fuckwit."

At greater length, have a look here. Scroll down a bit to find this chart:


Now, as I wrote to the talker, if words are to have meanings, they have to mean the same thing for everyone, leastwise if there is to be communication. In budgetary context, "cutting" is reducing spending. "Slashing" is massively reducing spending. To repeat myself, the Harris Tories increased health care spending every single year. No cutting, no slashing.

This leaves us a dichotomy. The "honourable" member either knows this, or he does not. If he knows it, he is just another lying sack of liberal shit. If he doesn't know it, he is too stupid or ill informed to be janitor in charge of replacing the urinal mints at Queen's Park, much less a minister for higher education and technology. You can probably guess which one I'm betting on.

Of course, to be charitable, he could be all of the above; stupid, ill informed, and a liar. Just not about this topic, not simultaneously.

You know what pissed me off the most, though? It wasn't that yet another McLimdick Minister lied about something. That's about as common as ice at the south pole. It wasn't the fact that the host let him get away with it. I'll be charitable and assume he simply doesn't know it to be a falsehood. It was the fact that Elizabeth Witmer, Harris' Minister of fucking Health from 1997 to 2001, was the next guest.

You can't tell me that the woman who presided over the annual budget increases didn't know that the budget, well, increased. Why the FUCK didn't she call the son of a bitch on the lie? I don't give a good fucking goddamn about collegiality, the man told a base lie about her ministry, and she let it go.

And so it enters deeper into the public consciousness, that the Harris Tories cut health care spending when they did no such fucking thing. Christ, Wikipedia flatly states that Witmer "presided over a controversial restructuring process which included a number of government cutbacks."

NO, SHE FUCKING DIDN'T, READ THE FUCKING BUDGET, OR LOOK AT THE FUCKING CHART. Increased budgets, EVERY FUCKING YEAR.

You know what else chafes my buns? Here we are, 6 fucking years after the lying pricks got elected, and it's still Liberal government policy to blame Harris. Hey, asspipes, guess what, it's yours, you own it. I know you're too fucking stupid to fix it, but please try not to fuck it up too much more before you get tossed out on your asses.

Shit, this ones long enough, and I haven't even gotten to Dickless Dalton's POS all day kindergarten program. Oh well, another time.

Broken Clock Theory Proven, McGuinty Gets One Right

Okay, I've been known to be a little harsh on the ferret-faced crapweasel we have for a Premier, but I'm a fair minded kind of guy. After all I'm not a conservative partisan, hell I'm not even a conservative, nor am I really anti-Liberal. Okay, I lied there, I really am anti-Liberal, but that's not because I'm a conservative, it's because I'm anti-asshole, and the left side of the political spectrum is a veritable magnet for bungholes in human form.

Having said that, it's time to give props to Premier McShithead. Yes, I said it, Dalton McNumbnuts actually got one right, proving again that even a blind squirrel occasionally finds a nut, and even a blind, retarded, spineless, corrupt, ferret-faced crapweasel can discover reality if it smacks him hard enough on the nose.

What am I talking about? This. McDickead actually came out in favour of a boys only school. It only took 30 years of trying to turn them into little girls, doping them up if they couldn't pay attention, and destroying their educational prospects and futures, for the geniuses in charge of the education system to notice that girls are doing better, and doing so at the expense of boys.

Did I say the expense of boys? Yes I did. From 1979 to 2001, women went from 40% to 56% of undergraduates. By 2005, 58% of graduate students were women, and over 60% of med school students are women.

Coincidence? Well, maybe. Maybe changing the curriculum to girl friendly had no effect at all. Maybe all that effort to make it easier for girls to pursue higher education just helped them, without hindering the boys at all. Maybe. Ahhh, who am I fucking kidding. There has been a dirty little war on boys for decades. The 3rd wave feminists hate us, and they've been actively trying to destroy us.

Don't believe me? How many women engineering students are there? Not terribly many, might be as high as 25%. How many men nursing students are there? A whole lot less than there are women in engineering. How many "crisis in nursing...more men needed" stories have you seen? How about the reverse case for engineering? What faculty is out there actively seeking to balance its existing sex imbalance? I'll give you a hint. It ain't nursing.

So, to conclude, Dalton McGuinty is still a corrupt, spineless, tax grabbing, back stabbing, lying crapweasel, but I gotta say, he did get this one right. Too bad the edumacators will find some way to sabotage it, so that the project to neuter the Canadian man can proceed apace.

Why Canada Sucks, Part VI, We're All Fascists Now

God DAMN I hate this fucking country. This is going to be a hard post to write, because there is just too much fucking material to sort through. I'll try not to get too excessive with it, though.

First, a matter of definitions. Fascism is a slippery word, so much so that, in the introduction to his book Liberal Fascism, Jonah Goldberg spills a fair bit of ink in attempting to pin down a definition of fascism, because the main problem is that there really isn't one. He eventually comes to a broad definition, which I can't reproduce, as I borrowed it from the library when I was unemployed and broke. A good working definition would be "Whatever Liberals hate," but that's of little use.

Instead let us turn to dictionary.reference.com, which gives the following:

a governmental system led by a dictator having complete power, forcibly suppressing opposition and criticism, regimenting all industry, commerce, etc., and emphasizing an aggressive nationalism and often racism

Aha, that's how we define those evil, right wing, fascist bastards. Nazzo fast, Guido, let's parse this. Leave aside the absolute dictator, and see if there's anything in there that might seem a bit, I don't know, left wing. You know, like regimenting (i.e. regulating) all industry, commerce, etc., suppressing opposition criticism ("Human Rights" Commissions), aggressive nationalism (Liberal MP Carolyn "Americans, I hate those bastards" Parrish) and racism (Bobo the Clown, Bob "White men need not apply" Rae).

Hmm, fits the Liberal and NDP to a fucking "T," doesn't it? Especially when you consider that the closest thing to an absolute dictator, outside of actual dictatorships, is a Canadian 1st Minister with a majority government. Don't believe me? Did Johnny Cretin change his mind for anyone when he was corrupting up 24 Sussex Dr. Did Brian Baloney before him, or the late, unlamented and never to be sufficiently cursed Pierre Elliot fucking Trudeau? No? Didn't think so.

So, if we dispense with the nonsense that Fascism is a conservative ideology, we come to the conlcusion it is a Liberal ideology. Which brings us to a few events of late.

Dalton fucking McGuinty. Untendered contracts resulting in the pissing away of a billion dollars to Liberal friendly firms. Who the fuck does he think he is, giving my money away to his friends like that, Chretien? Oh, and if you think he's not a fascist fucker, is anyone getting fired for this? Or is he stonewalling, since he has a majority and can do whatever he wants.

Speaking of whatever he wants, how many of you want the tax hike represented by the HST? Anyone? Really. Hmm, think that 70% in opposition is going to stop it? Absolute dictator anyone?

Lest you think I'm picking solely on our main source of fascists, the Liberals, how about Prime Minister Ringo Starr and the proposed changes to RIDE programs. At least right now they have to have an officer sniff your breath before they violate your rights. The new proposal is just to randomly pull people over to butt rape their rights. Think that's not fascist?

And why do I entitle this post "We're All Fascists Now?" Well, remember when the province tried to make bike helmets mandatory for everyone? It was probably Bobo the Clown, but I don't really remember, and whoever it was, isn't the point. Now McShithead wants to make ski helments mandatory. Hey, Dalton, fuck off. It's my fucking head, and I'll do with it as I please, you fascist fuck. But I digress.

When I first heard the story, it was one of the local talkers, who asked his listeners to call or write in with their opinions. Not one, NOT A FUCKING ONE, opined that it's none of the provinces fucking business to regulate ski helmet use. "...regimenting all business, commerce, etc..."

Hey, Ontario, if you want to wear a ski helmet, WEAR A FUCKING SKI HELMET. You can do this without there being a law to make you, you know. You stupid fascist fuckers.

Smoking laws. Seatbelt laws. Business regulations. Banking regulations. Your fireplace. Your toilet. There is nothing, NOTHING in your life that these pricks don't want control over. And they'll get it. Do you know why they'll get it? First, because a Canadian first minister with a majority government is the closest thing to an absolute dictator in the developed world, second, they frame as much as possible as a health care issure and third, we're a nation of pussies, too afraid to stand up for our rights.

Smoking regulations? Health care. Cook up some bullshit study about second hand smoke and you can regulate it to death.

Seatbelts? Helmets? Health care. If you get hurt, it's on the public dime, so the govt has a financial responsibility to fuck your rights.

Salt, fat, meat, and anything else that tastes good? Heart disease, diabetes and colon cancer.

Explain this to the average Canadian (and use small words so there's a chance the moron will get it), and see if he manages to draw the obvious conclusion. If you want to live free. Either leave Canada, or end the health care monopoly. That won't deal with the busy body assholes who just can't stand to see someone having fun, but it will yank the pins out from under the "Well, the govt is paying for your health care, so they have the right to tell you how to live" argument.

Of course, even if you convince the average Canadian pussy that freedom from govt health care is a good thing, he'll never actually voice the thought out loud, for fear of sounding unCanadian. There's nothing worse than be outed as being in favour of "Two Tier, American Style Health Care." Hell, I think the gutless wimps in this country think that if you express that opinion, they'll strip you of your citizenship or, worse yet, ban you from Tim Horton's for life.

Have I mentioned lately that I hate this fucking country?

McGuinty, You're an Asshole

So, Premier McDickhead is steaming ahead, full speed, to fuck over the Cambridge Memorial Hospital. The hospital, according to the evening news, is about 5 million dollars in the red. According to the local dead tree media, it's 6.5 million in the red, and I'll use their numbers. This is all, according to Premier McGetafuckingclue, 100% totally, absolutely the hospitals fault, there's no more money, and the board will just have to make cuts to make up the shortfall. Let us see how quickly we can tear up that steaming turd.

Hospital budget: $106 million
Hospital deficit: $6.5 million
Deficit expressed as a percentage: 6.1%

Average Ontario per patient funding: $1009
Cambridge per patient funding: $730
Funding expressed as percentage of the average: 72.3%

So, McShithead, tell me again that the hospital budgetary shortfall is due to inefficiency. Just looking at those numbers indicates to me 2 things. First, that Cambridge has one of the most efficiently administered hospitals in the province. Hell, it should be a model for other hospitals, just imagine the level of care should they be given even 80% average funding. Second, you are a lying sack of shit. A boil on the body politic. A smarmy little creep who is playing politics with the lives of Cambridge residents.

You say there's no money, yet you've comitted 30 Billion dollars for health care upgrades. The Cambridge hospital is 10 fucking years overdue its sorely needed expnansion, and isn't even on the list for this money. But maybe for the next one. You oozing pustule, just because the good citizens of Cambridge don't elect Liberals to Queen's Park is no reason to train wreck their hospital, and fuck with their health care. In case you hadn't realized, everyone in this crappy country is subject to our POS, single payer health care system, and your petty partisan politics have no part in it.

In short, McCumstain, fuck of and die, you maggot.

Good Riddance

I said these exact words the day that the late, unlamented and never to be sufficiently cursed Pierre f'ing Elliot f'ing Trudeau kicked it:

Good riddance to bad garbage, and 40 years too late.

Senator Edward "Teddy the Swimmer" "Drunken Lifeguard" "This Isn't Your Father's Buick" Kennedy has finally begun the eternal celestial dirt nap. Good. Shame it didn't occur 40 years ago.

They say you shouldn't speak ill of the dead. Why the fuck not? The man was a drunken, philandering, murdering, treasonous, freedom hating, freedom destroying, terrorist loving piece of shit, and we are richer for his death. My only regret (other than how overdue his passing really was) is that I cannot take comfort in his eternal roast in hell, as I do not believe such a place exists.

I'm not going to say any more, as others will say it better. I'll simply leave it with Physics Geek's standard Kennedy comment, "Mary Joe Kopechne couldn’t be reached for comment."

Emperor Misha (there's more than just one post, and enjoy the comments to this one).
Bill Quick (also more than one post, visit the main site)
Ace (also more than one post, visit the main site)
Jay Currie and I seem to be on the same page
Darlene Click at Protein Wisdom is a helluva lot nicer than I
Dan Collins is at least 50% nicer than I
Serr8d has a good one
The Other McCain has some thoughts

More if and as I feel like it.

Update:

Just saw Pres-Uh-dent Uh-bam-uh on the evening news. Called Chappaquidick Ted one of the greatest Americans. By what fucking standard, President Zerobama? I know you have to lie. Hell, I know you're congenitally incapable of telling the truth, but one of the greatest Americans? Hyperbole ought to have limits. Even if you don't think he was a total piece of shit, there have been wayyyy too many great Americans to mention the Lifeguard in their company.

And City TV news bunny? It's called "News" not "Hagiography for liberal sacks of shit." Ted's dead, you can stop fellating him now.

Happy Dominion Day

No, I won't wish you a happy "Canada Day". "Canada Day" is one of the things about this "nation" which sucks. The reason for it is our utter contempt for history and tradition. Can you think of any other first world country which changed the name of its national holiday?

Worse yet, can you think of another first world nation which changed its flag?

This is not the flag of Canada, hell, this is not even a flag...

This POS is a trademark, brought to us by Lester B. f'ing Pearson, Liberal asshole.

This is the flag of Canada...


Unfortunately, after 45 years, the former is far more representative of Canada than the latter.

Happy Dominion Day.