So, we're past another Victoria Day weekend. A holiday weekend commemorating the birth of thAT Queen of England who reigned when we took our first baby steps away from England, on the road to nationhood, a trip that took a mere 114 years, but that's another story. What is it about the long weekend that sets me off on another "Why Canada Sucks?" Long weekends, or, more specifically, the fact that we have too many of them.
Once upon a time, holidays celebrated something. Queen Victoria's Birthday. Our newly founded Dominion. The new year. Christ's birthday. Something.
Then something changed. Once upon that time, Canadians were an industrious people, we had to be, to carve a life, and a living out of a pretty hostile place. Then something happened, and we became a pack of useless layabouts.
Not content with celebrating real things, we started making shit up. So, in addition to our real holidays; New Years, Victoria Day, Dominion Day, Remembrance Day, Christmas, and Boxing Day, we've added; Labour Day (hey, Commies deserve a holiday, too), "Civic Holiday (because it's just too long to go from July until September without a long weekend) and "Family Day" (because, well, Premier McShithead is approximately as bright as the lily my mother gave me for Easter). And, somewhere in the middle of all that, we removed Remembrance Day, and via the late, unlamented and never to be sufficiently cursed Pierre Eliot fucking Traitordeau, renamed Dominion Day to Canada Day.
That's right, Canada is such a ridiculous place that Ontario now has an official holiday called "Family Day," commemorating Dalton McMoron's pandering to the lazy demographic, we don't celebrate the armistice of WW I, and the sacrifice of over 100 000 dead, and many more wounded, servicemen, and we actually RENAMED OUR NATIONAL HOLIDAY.
Canada Sucks.
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