Thursday, May 7, 2009

Standards of Beauty

In a previous post I introduced a set of questions. The one I will address here is, based upon my choice of title, standards of beauty.

Ladies, a question. Why did you allow gay men to become the arbiters of feminine beauty? Seriously, I want to know. Letting Penis Hilton judge a beauty pageant is like me asking Rosie O'Doughnuts for advice on how to be a real hunk, unobtainable as that goal may be. Now, I can't speak for all men, but I'm pretty sure the average guy isn't seeking out the nearest dyke for advice on how to look good for his lady. If he were, Sears Roebuck would see one hell of a run on plaid shirts and coveralls, and the barber's would be limited to mullets. And, I suspect, there would be a lot of cold and lonely nights. Women, on the other hand...

Okay, there are three major fora in which standards of beauty are set; fashion, show business, and pageants. All three areas are pretty much the purview of gays; they design the clothes, they do the makeup, take the pictures, they publish the magazines, they judge the results, and the women in these areas reflect it. What, exactly, would you expect a gay man to decide the ideal woman to be? Slim, muscular, small butt/hips, definitely not too curvy, but for those icky breeders, better add some breasts. I know, how about a teenaged boy with a rack? Models, actresses and beauty contestants...teenaged boys with teats.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know I'm making assumptions about what gay men find attractive, based on a fairly limited experience pool (in fact, mostly I'm reverse engineering). Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure there are exceptions in Hollywood (although, I can't actually think of one), but they are exceptions, and there aren't a whole lot of curves in the modeling world, are there? And it seems the beauty contestants need to get rubberized to have curves, so I stand by my point. Oh, and as to fake boobs, I'm with Stacy McCain, and opposed to Velociman on this one. Big or small, real looks better.

Ladies, before I hear any more whining about society's horrendous standards of beauty, consider who sets them, and consider who lets the deciders decide. All the men I know like their women to have curves, and don't expect those curves to be surgically created, or enhanced.

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